I played marbles a lot in grade school. (Lost a lot of my marbles there! đŚ) I learned teamwork playing first base and sometime shortstop on a girlsâ baseball team in junior high. (Softball was for wimps, and we were good enough to consistently beat the boysâ team.)  But one of the most important lessons in life I learned playing Jacks.
My friends and I gathered for a Jacks-a-thon every recess on the covered cement patio outside the parish hall of our Lutheran school. Weâd sit, legs folded neatly to the side. In those days, we wore dresses properly tucked to protect our modesty. (Thank God for slacks that came with feminism!) At first, weâd play with the rubber ball that came with the set at the five and dime. As time progressed, we began using golf balls, which bounced better.
It was a quiet game, and I loved quietâeven as a kid. We broke into twosâdifferent pairs at different times. It helped us all connect as friends, and those friendships continue today. I donât know who was best. (Chances are if I were best, Iâd remember. đ)
Jacks is a game that has its own built-in order and practice. First pick up one, then two, then three and so on. One canât get to the next pickup until one finishes the last. If you missed a pickup, you started again. Itâs a good game to prepare for life. Sometimes, I think too far down the road: How am I going to pick up ten? When I throw the jacks out, will they spread too far? In reality, I can only play the game in order. And when I get to the number ten, I will be practiced and ready for it.
What I learned playing Jacks works well in my writing. I ask myself when I’m going to find time to write. How am I going to write my next chapterâdefine my character? What will I do to market my book? But, as in the game of Jacks, writing is done one step at a time, and if I can concentrate on today, tomorrow will take care of itself.
âSufficient unto the day is the trouble thereof.â Thatâs somewhere in the Bible. Keeping on task, not worrying about the next step, accepting mistakes and continuing on, letting the game (and life) unfold in logical order can be applied to any task in any environment. It works in small tasks like cooking, cleaning and paying bills and in large efforts like marriage, raising children, the work environment and planning for retirement.
I only have to train my mind to stay in the moment, to pick up what I need to learn today, to let step ten be what happens another dayâand nothing I need to worry about now. When I get off track, I remember those games with my friends and remind myself that life and Jacks should be played in a similar way.
Deb, I’ve never heard of the saying, “Bit by bit is a cinch, yard by yard is hard.” New one to me. Thank you, Marcia and Damon.
As always, Laurel, lovely and insightful! I so enjoy reading your words of wisdom. This piece reminds me of
another saying that I recently learned: Bit by bit is a cinch, yard by yard is hard. So, you are correct about staying focused on the immediate needs at the moment. Worrying about tomorrow only slows down today’s progress.
Loved your blog. I hadn’t thought about jacks in a long time. We never considered a golf ball (not a lot of golf courses in rural Nebraska in 1950’s!), sounds like a great idea!
Yes, life works so much better a step, a day at a time & focusing on the next step rather than the end result.
Well done Mom. I love all the parallels you drew with Mindfulness. I’m learning and benefiting from this technique quite a bit lately.
I liked the game of jacks, but not baseball so well. Your piece reminded me of something my son said about getting projects done that is applicable to your Jacks story, “How do you eat an elephant, Mom? One bite at a time.”
Thanks, Juliana. It was so good to meet you this weekend. Happy that my blog brought back good memories of you and your twin sister.
Jacks and Life, it makes me think of the conversation we had when we met. I felt this story because I lived it. But even if I hadn’t remembered the first time my twin sister and I used a golf ball, or played up to 20 instead of 10, your story made me play jacks again as an adult!
I also really enjoyed the comments left by others.
I’m glad it helped, Jody. I know that marketing can be intimidating. Good luck on your new book. I’m sure it will do well. Thanks, Nancy, Christine and Nancy. I’m delighted that my blog brought back good childhood memories.
It is interesting to me how what we do as children , like playing games, can have such a profound impact on our adult lives. I I wish more of my friends had played jacks!
You make me wish I’d played the game. In my Cleveland neighborhood Jacks was not the usual game played. We played other games, such as bouncing a tennis ball, putting a leg over the ball while reciting “A my name is Alice, husband’s name is Adam” etc. all the way through the alphabet. Guess I learned that way to be a good speller. We jumped rope quite a bit, too, also reciting words I don’t remember. We learned from those games to play together, to take turns and to share. Thank you for the reminder that our childhood informs our adult daily lives. Always enjoy reading your pieces.
Our grade school, named for Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, had a large step, almost a porch, that you stepped on as you went out the door. Then we took another step down to the gravel playground. That concrete porch had an almost glassy surface, much smoother than the rest of the concrete, and it was perfect for Jacks, which was a perfect game for warm fall days. I’d forgotten about using the golf ball, which was certainly superior — more trustworthy — than the flighty red one so easily knocked askew. Thanks, Laurel, for reminding me how much we enjoyed a fun game that also taught us worthwhile life lessons.
I’m always uplifted by your writing and with such insight into human frailties. Your metaphor gave me a boost toward my marketing of my newly released book. I really hate marketing as it seems “not fun”…but thinking about it as a game of jacks has given me new energy…think I’ll use a golf ball. Thanks, Laurel Jean. Jody Glittenberg
Thank you, Barbara and Janet. I’m sure many of us played this game, and I’m delighted you both can relate. I struggle with the ten before three and also need to take one step at a time. And yes, a golf ball is much more efficient.
What an excellent lesson for life you gained from a quiet game we both played and enjoyed as girls. I especially enjoyed your comparison to jacks and writing, having experienced, when working on my book, the inefficiency of worrying about ten jacks instead of concentrating on the three currently in play. You chose and developed with skill a powerful metaphor for those of us who knew the pleasure of playing jacks at recess. I only wish my friends and I had thought of using a golf ball.
As we say here in Ecuador, poco a poco. Little by little. Works everywhere, doesn’t it, Laurel. Good insights!